You know what really grinds my gears?

A number of things. The most recent being a recurring thing. People coming to me with bullshit problems. Especially if this person is a repeat offender. Now don't get me wrong, I do like to give advice and at least try to help my friends out when I can. There's just a few things that make me want to scream I DON'T FUCKING CARE, GET A LIFE. Those things include:

1) Relationship problems-- I have no idea why people come to me for relationship advice. I've never had one, so I first of all can't speak from experience. Secondly, I'm not exactly what you would call normal so, something that one person may get mad at, I would either enjoy or laugh about. Example: "He never calls me!"
Me: "That's fucking awesome! I hate the phone!"
It's a lame example but the only one I could think of.

Pretty much after this relationships are tied in, but let's continue.

2) Problems that can't be solved-- Someone comes to me with a problem and they don't know what to do about it. I come up with at least three solutions but none of them will work because of some other bizarre aspect you conveniently left out the first time you told me the problem. If you want help tell me everything first off, don't sit around and watch me waste time. I can do that without your help. Example:

"I'm so stressed out! I have a test tomorrow and I didn't study!"
Me: "So study now."
"I can't! I left my books at a friends house!"
"So go get them."
"They're not home!"
"Call them."
"I don't know their number!"
"Stop yelling at me."

3) People who have problems but don't say anything-- Ok, I'm the first one to admit, we all have bad days and get into bad moods. But for the love of God, don't sit around (in public aka the livingroom) being mopey or bitchy...or both. Not only is that going to make you feel worse but it's going to piss me off and make you feel worse. I don't like it when people yell at me for stupid things. Then get madder when I respond with a 'tone'. Look, either stay in your room or take a walk or something. At the very least say, "hey, I'm in bad mood, so bitches stay outta my way." Or, "I'm pretty pissed because this happened today..." At least then I know there's a reason behind the yelling and I can ignore it or make it worse for my amusment. Example:
"E.B.! You yelled at me for going after your food but you didn't even eat your vegtables!"
Me: "....what?"
"You came in and when I said I was about to eat your food you got mad and said 'why would you do that?'!"
Me:"....fuck you. How about that?"

4) Oh woe is me!--I know, I'm back on the relationship wagon again. I try to get out but they keep pulling me back in! We've all met this type. "I've always had abusive relationships, I don't know what to do. I can't ever be close to anyone again..." These piss me off the most. But still I try to help out despite the ulcer growing in my stomach from holding in anger. This also mixes with the 'problems that can't be solved' catagory. Now, I usually give the whole 'these things take time...stop crying you're embarrassing yourself...I mean it the food court is no place for this..." But they keep coming up with reasons of why they can't get over it. Again, I've never been in this position so maybe it's more complicated or difficult then I think. However, I find it hard to believe it is that difficult. You don't like someone anymore or the make you feel bad. Dump 'em. There. "She was horrible to me and lied all the time. So we're not together anymore. I feel like shit everyday." This I don't understand. If they were so horrible, why are you still pining after you breakup especially after YOU DID THE BREAKING UP?
Now, I can accept this within reason: "Yeah, we broke up I know it's for the better, but I still miss him a little bit."
"That will go in time. Then we can find you some new man meat."
"Okays!"
See what happened there? They showed intelligence in knowing it was for the better, and understanding that this shit takes time.
This is what I can't deal with: "I've been through so much in the past year, everyone says I'm acting different. I'm broken and I don't like being single but I don't think I can let anyone get close to me ever again."
Angrys up my blood just to type it. Alright, so first of all if you really are 'broken' you don't acknowledge it and tell people that unless that's what you, yourself and only you want to be known as.
Second: you think you're the only one who has to go through stuff? You're telling me you went through hell because of a girlfriend? My mom nearly died where were you to hear about that from me? Exactly no where because I deal with that shit myself in my way. To be completely honest next time you come near me with that shit I'm telling you to get a sex change you damn woman and go fuck yourself. At least when you're a woman it will be more socially accepted for you to watch your teen dramas over and over again while you cry into a tub of ice cream.

Well, I think that about covers it all. I feel much better now. But seriously, I gotta get a life myself. Resorting to putting everything I hate online? Who does that?
I'm out until I find something new to hate...